This Brooding Tacit Love' by Kokila Gupta
Our souls entwined, yet I pine
For a nameless union,
Each waking moment, dreamy sleep
In the reverie in between, in illusion
I wrote on winds wafting through lands,
On clouds- my words pouring as rains,
On leaves falling down fecundating the grounds,
On which she walked in dawn's dulcet refrains
My words scattered on merry blooms,
On nightingales’ notes, on lonely shores
Caress perhaps, she'll with pearl fingers
My feelings would ignite her soul
And I'd meet her there in mist, in storms
In winds, in soil, in woods, dry leaves
She, ambrosia for my tortured being
And I her rapture, I knew, believed.
'Feel me!' in delirium I cried -
'In bold strokes of dusk and noons
In gold edged hues of autumnal reds
Ochre russets maroons and pinks
Are all my love's auros aubades
With thousand silent words of love
You've promised, spoke volumes to my soul
O Love, like a witch you had had me ere,
Crossing you at that fateful threshold!
United in soul we'll be together on this land
When blue orioles sing by twilit amber lakes,
If only for one day ere doom, till last breath,
Last day-break, you clasped in my embrace
In this unutterable abyss that your absence is
I experience love like foliage changing at season's whim
You the rock beneath unchanged, unaltered
Your warm smiles to crack me with a lilting chim!
Seeping inside my brooding heart, my parched soul providing respite from life;
Nay, You ARE life! the bittersweet wine
Even the gods are envious of our love, they forget
O beloved; you are ME not just mine."
How I long; what wouldn't I pledge,
To hear how fervently you feel for me!
Though, I know each word you left unsaid,
Each tacit emotion that surges in your being,
Yet, I feel a pang, an ache to hear
Proclaimation of your love gush out, drench me
The sound of your words saying, 'I mean the world to you',
I yearn for these heady words uttered to me!
Come look, this yellow scarf in my tangled hair,
Its summer tied in plaits of my auburn braid
Its each turn those days in prairies gold,
Its twists our nights under silver hay
That wayward ribbon from my tresses
Now faded like life, in pocket thine,
Dyed once in pink with carefree young love
With soaring spirits of love's first shine
I rushed through vales on moonless nights
I searched for you through spring, through fall
The world may laugh, call me absurd
My soul seeks your soul from eternities all
Am sunshine; moon gleams from my glow
My sillage stays like blackbird's lingering melody
O Darkness, you made my moon burn like a jewel,
Gratitude to your tenebrosity!
As twilight simmers with a sweet melancholy
My heart somersaults with blazing pyres
Like phoenix rises the joy of our sleepless eyes
From silver ashes of dreamy desires
Ah, the opal orb of my longings, my plight
Pinned to the bosom of tempestuous night
Embraces me in his stygian umbrage
To eclipse us both from prying eyes!
With smouldering eyes of argent fire
That scar on temple I so admire,
Your gaunt face with pulsating nerve,
That ominous brooding, the well-hidden verve
Dark tousled hair like crashing waves
The rugged charm of raw passionate gaze
Elements at war, conflicted soul -
Part savage, part nurturing, part soft
These loyal eyes with a primitive gleam
Under moss covered rainbow ruins of dreams
You touched me on that leafy ground
Stardust and fairies flitted around
Lavender fields swelled up in my bosom cold
I find you- an uncut gem, a river of scintillating molten gold!
Destined by Gods to pine, stay apart and mourn
But, 'The honeysuckles have embraced the thorn'
O celestials riding in the wake of night, O starry stream,
This sunshine glows from her moon's loving argent gleam,
Born in a literary environment of AatmvatSarvBhuteshu, with poems as lullabies; philosophy as bedtime stories, Kokila Gupta was brought up amid mountains and valleys nurturing a deep love for nature and simplicity. She chose Immuno-Parasitology as her field of study and later resigned from a Government job to pursue her other interests. Her prose, poetry, musings or Haiku, all express a natural affinity for life in mundane spontaneity. She is an artist by nature, a reader by birth, a lecturer by profession, a traveller by passion and a writer/poet by choice.